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Global warming

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Global warming


John was surprised by the sudden halt of the horses. He was about to fall in his nose.

“What are you doing, man? What’s wrong?”

Without a word, Ion jumped out of his wagon and ran into the vineyard. He stopped behind the briers at the end of the vineyard. He pulled on the zipper of the paints, but no way to succeed. Annoyed, he pulled on his belt and pulled his trousers down. He sighed with an undiscovered pleasure. In the wagon, Geo laughed with his hands on his stomach.

“Man, couldn’t you piss from the wagon? Did you need to spoil people’s grapes?”

John looked at him crookedly, not saying a word. He took a step toward the wagon, but stopped abruptly. He stared with his eyes fixed beyond the vineyard, toward the cloud of forests, which seemed to have lit up from the sun that had just set. A bloody sky, which was left to one side of a giant, red and flabby sun. He lay on his knees, near the grass at the side of the road, staring at the remote forest.

“What happened to you, man? Something hurts you?”

“Geo, what will you do, man, if the Earth takes fire?”

“What do you mean? Wow, you’ve gone crazy! Come on, let ‘s go, I’m hungry, I have not eaten anything since morning.”

“Yes, man. Have not you heard on TV that the weather is changing? Do not you see that the Lame’s Lake has dried up? Even the sun seems to be getting bigger.”

“It’s big in your head!”

“Man, they said on television, where are you living?! Anyway, I did it.”

“What have you did?”

“Come to my house to show you.”

John hits with the whip on the back of the left horse. “Go, old lady!”. The wagon started as suddenly as she stopped, the two friends falling on the back.

* * *

John raised the courtyard door and pushed it to one side. Geo sneaked into the courtyard of the house, where a large, lean and dirty dog ​​greeted him, leaping on him with his paws bouncing gleefully.

“Go away, I have nothing to give you, I didn’t come from home!”

The dog stepped back two steps and sat down in his ass.

“Leave him, Geo, my wife gave him to eat this morning. Better come here.”

John grabbed Geo by the hand and dragged him down to the back of the house, beside a shutter lying on the ground.

“What are you doing man, you want me to enter in the basement? Didn’t you say that the side walls fell and you blocked it?”

“I said, man, I say a lot. It was not to tell everyone. I am showing you now, take a look, to die of envy.

John shifted the basement to one side and both stepped carefully on the steep and slippery steps. The chill of the basement made Geo rub his shoulders. When they got down, John lit a match, took a light from the entrance and lit the wick with the match, then made the flame bigger. Geo was about to fall on the back of amazement: on the both sides of the basement there were carefully lined up, on the shelves, rusks of dried samp, arranged nicely in tomato boxes.

“What are you doing, man, since when did you start fishing? And what are you doing with so much fish bait here?”

“It’s not bait, Geo, it’s my food supplies.”

“What food supplies, man, are you crazy?” Geo saw in the bottom of the basement two chairs, and, on both sides of the seats, well arranged on stumps, two carboys of 100 liters each. He looked more closely at them.

“Hey, is it not that my wine? I know him by color.”

“It was yours, but you gave it to me, one can every time. You forgot that I gave you every time a chicken to make soup, because you had no more chickens due to that flu. So I had no more wine from March because of the tests.”

“What tests?”

“Do you remember that almost a month I was walking around the street a little dizzy? Well, I was not dizzy, I was in tests. They said on TV that wine is food, and I wanted to check it out, to be sure I could rely on it. I resisted even five days in that period without eating, but I did not miss the wine. You know they’re right. Besides, it can replace the water very well. But for any event, I also made these rusks of samp.”

John sat down on his side, sighing.

“I still have two problems that I do not know how to solve them, and I will be prepared if the Earth takes fire: my mother-in-law and the cabbage barrel. With my mother-in-law it’s simpler. I do not have much room for her in the basement, and she also eats and drinks more than me, besides if she starts to shake my head, I will do murder orb I go out and melt away from the heat. The more complicated problem is with the cabbage barrel. I’m sorry to take it out in the heat, because the cabbage will go phut. And if I leave it in the basement, I have to have some brandy next to it, because I have never ate cabbage without a glass of brandy beside me. Is that so, kind of you still have a couple of carboys with brandy?”

“Oh, fuck you, John!”


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